Wednesday, April 5, 2017

Writing Woes: Failing To Launch

I feel like the participation banner for this year's Camp National Novel Writing Month speaks of my woes. It makes we want to rip the antlers off the silhouette bunnies and thrust them in my eye sockets. A bit violent, I know, but at least I won't have to read "find your plot bunny" and be reminded that I have no plot. And no characters. And no project.

In other words, I have writer's block.

Or decision block.

I have pages of ideas. Years of free writing notebooks are tucked away in an organizer not far from where I'm sitting. I've sifted through them, page after page, and read over old entries to get glimpses into what I could summon into text this month. I'd pick one idea, prepare to start writing, change my mind, and shift to another idea. This has been happening almost non-stop for over two weeks. It's April 5th at 3AM, and I have nothing. Not a word. Not even a title.

I'm sure I'm having this problem because I haven't written any fiction since February.

I keep making excuses. "Oh, I'm busy with freelance work." "I don't feel like it." "My ADHD is acting up and I can't focus." "I can come up with better ideas tomorrow." Those are the same ideas that kept me from starting a blog and actually writing posts on it. They're also the same excuses I pull out when I have to do house work, socialize with people, or try anything that takes effort. And then I daydream for ten hours and then I go to bed feeling like an unproductive garbage pile that's only polluting the world with my presence. It's a joyous cycle. A cycle that's lead me to ideas but no work done.

That's the thing about writing: if you want to be a writer, you have to write.

A+ quote. You're welcome.

There could be worse writer's block to have, honestly. I could have no ideas. Or I could think all my ideas are terrible. Or I could have a singular idea but have no idea where to start. There are ideas! Some very solid ideas, in fact. I just need to choose.

Or I could make an excuse. Like "I need to update by blog". Yeah, that sounds like a good one.